With Ava's Anxiety last year, there were many hard days for her as she got on that bus everyday. She cried, and in turn I cried. Her daddy even had hard days watching her have to face something she was so anxious about. I understood her anxiety because I too struggled with hating having to go to school when I was a little girl. I can remember the yucky feeling in my stomach. I remember crying silently on the bus as I was leaving my mom and heading off to a place I just didn't want to be. I always liked my teachers and Ava liked her teacher last year, but it didn't take away the pain and frustration of the just simply not wanting to be there. School is out of her comfort zone, just like mine. She hated leaving us in the morning and would worry about what she was missing out on while she was gone. Now, I know this year was much easier on her since Christian would be along with her, and she had someone to "BE WITH" at school. She had a purpose! I had actually requested Christian to get Ava's teacher from the year before because I loved her and knew she would be great with Christian, but I knew nothing about the first grade teachers and I knew nothing about who to ask for her to have, so I left it in God's hands. The night of Ava's open house, I was amazed at what we found. We found out who her teacher was and as we were walking to her room, Ava noticed it was close to her classroom last year. When we arrived at her room, she was overjoyed to see it was the room directly across from Mrs. Boward's room that she was in last year!!! She was soooooooooooooo excited and the relief on her face brought tears to my eyes.
Was this a little thing that we were making a big deal out of or was this a huge GOD THING? Let me share what I saw this as. . . . a way that God was showing ME he cared about my kids and HE was in control, NOT ME!!! The reasons are as follows:
1.) Ava wanted to walk Christian to his class everyday so she could say hi to Mrs. Boward and because she wanted him to "not be scared" :) This would have been difficult for her to do depending on where the classrooms were located in this rather large elementary school. But now, she stops in EVERY day to see her Mrs. Boward and to drop off her brother. :)
2.) Ava's anxiety needed to be put behind itself to have a purpose and Christian is her purpose. However, he doesn't realize this, but every time she is leaving her classroom and sees him and he waves at her and smiles at her or runs over to hug her (even when that is not allowed) it makes her feel special and loved and though she may not admit it, she LOVES and NEEDS his acceptance and encouragement. Being directly across from each other, they run into each other more often than not throughout the day.
3.) I knew enough to know I could have a little say in who Christian got as a teacher, but I was ignorant about what to expect in the next grade, so I had no idea who to request. Then, the night of open house, I walk in to meet her teacher and here it is the lady I ran into last year at Field Day and we struck up a conversation and had talked for about 15 minutes. I didn't even know that day what grade she taught or anything. I would have requested her that year if I had known but I didn't even catch her name that day last spring. However, when I walked in and she recognized me and I recognized her, again, Ava's eyes lit up. She even ran over and hugged Mrs. Brubaker.
I could go on and on but the main point I am trying to say is, GOD knew all of this and knew what my kids needed more than I did. He masterfully planned out this LITTLE DETAIL and made it happen for Ava, for Christian and for daddy and myself. Micah and I walked away realizing one major thing. I could have tried to orchestrate all of this, but it would have taken a lot of time and caused more stress and who knows if it would have worked out or not. But When God wants something done, it happens and NO STRESS on my part. And if HE cares about my kids that much as to work out these Kindergarten and First Grade issues, then someday when things are hard in their lives, I know to remember this moment and trust He is working on their behalf. Then I need to leave it at that and thank HIM for being GOD and knowing what it Best!!!!
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