Christian & His Transformer Back Pack

I have been blogging quite a bit about how Ava has been preparing for school and all the emotional and physical steps taken.  I have not mentioned much of how our little guy has handled this new season of life.  I guess anyone that knows our two kids knows that Christian is social and LOVES going places.  He hates being left out or left behind and this is exactly what the last few weeks have left him feeling.  I understand this emotion and fear of being "left behind" because I have had it my whole life. I hated camp for that reason because I hated being the last one to be ready or the last one to pee or the last one to take a shower, because I was so afraid of being left while they all started to our next event without me.  I see this in Christian.  I am constantly having to assure him that I am not going to go outside to the vehicle without him while he is taking time to put his shoes on.  He cries often because he constantly thinks "you leaved without me."  This very thing in him breaks my heart because I know even now, as an adult, I like to leave a party or an event early so I am not the last one to leave.  I have to make a conscious effort to verbally remind him all the time that we are not leaving without him or that I am waiting for him.  The problem is he doddles so often and that makes me irritated because I may have been telling him to go get his shoes on for a half hour, and he is just now starting to go do that task, as we are ready to walk out the door.  Ok, so all this said, now we have the issue of a huge event happening in his BIG SISTERS life and he is once again, left behind.

In our attempts as parents, to help build excitement about school for our kindergartner, we found that we left our son feeling left out that he was not going to get to go to school.  When we went back pack shopping, he wanted a back pack and we opted not to get him one that night.  We were wavering back and forth between the part of teaching him that sometimes you just have to wait your turn for things in life.  However, we noticed that night, after we came home and tucked them in bed, that Christian was in a weird mood.  Finally, as I crawled up and laid beside him in bed, he started grumping around at me and saying he didn't want me anymore.  After, talking to him, I finally got it out of him that he was sad Ava was going to school and he wasn't.  He was MAD at her for Leaving him.  He was mad that he was not old enough to go to school. He was mad he wasn't going to ride the bus and he wasn't getting a back pack.  As I was talking to him, I knew when I hit it on the nose, because he went from a grumpy mean scowled face to immediately eyes full of tears and he put out his little lip as he tried not to let me see he was crying.  He shook his head yes to him being sad Ava was going and he was not.  This was a moment when Micah and I realized he needed a book bag and we were not using this moment to teach him fairness.  So we comforted him, and then whispered all the fun things we were going to do after his sister went to school. Then the next day, on the way home from work, daddy stopped and bought Christian his Transformers Backpack.  His excitement on his face was so sincere, we knew it was exactly what he needed.  This was three days before school started and this little guy carried this back pack with him everywhere, and he even slept with it. :)

You probably saw it the day Ava started school, as he carried his on his back just like her.  It also showed up in the back to school parties we had with our families and he is so proud of this bag.  The best part to me was as we started doing things through the first week of school, that back pack made a consistent appearance at each event.  It was as though it was attached to him.  

Here he is wearing his back pack while we fed the ducks. 

At the Library he wore it and we even carried books in it which made him feel so grown up. 

We went over to visit Sofia and Roman and Sofi had her back pack too.  They were so proud as they sported their very own grown up back packs.  They were the big kids now. :)

We went to the car shop to get our vehicle's oil changed and of course he took his bag in filled with snacks, drink, and toys and he was so proud to tell anyone who would listen about his new back pack that he had gotten for school. Then I had to explain he wasn't going to school but it was all good.  It was a fun time and he melted my heart as he showed off his proud new apparel.

Overall, he is doing much better now and I am so grateful.  He seems to have adjusted well to this new season in our families life.  However, in saying that, I also will say he misses her dearly and he hates seeing her leaving on that big bus.  He has even cried a little after she has left, but this just shows me how much he loves his sis. :)